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Reports are piling up of couples breaking up and divorcing as a result of being quarantined together from Covid-19. I can’t say that I’m too shocked, as many couples tend to live on autopilot and rarely spend time together. All of a sudden when forced to face your partner all day every day, many couples are realizing that they’ve become strangers or don’t even like spending time together. Or at least, this is what happens if you’ve let your relationship slip away over the years without being conscious of it. Then there are couples simply bickering from boredom or frustration. Matthew and I fall into the second category, but we learned pretty quickly how to work around our feelings and find happiness at home during the pandemic. With respect for ourselves and our partners, any couple can find happiness together in the time of Covid-19.
Matthew and I are doing ok. We’re one of those couples that loves to spend all of our time together and quality time is one of our combined love languages. We also make it a priority to check in with one another frequently to make sure our relationship is healthy and our needs are being met. We already had a strong foundation before the pandemic hit the United States. But it can be too much sometimes when the entire world is in shut down. Every relationship and every individual needs balance in their lives. We need time apart to pursue our independent passions, to have quality time with friends and relatives outside of our relationship, and time to work on ourselves.
Every relationship needs balance to grow because we need to take care of ourselves as individuals and love ourselves before we can give that love and attention to others. As a result of our frustrations, Matthew’s in particular as his extroverted nature makes it difficult to feel “stuck” or “trapped,” we have been bickering more than usual, but thankfully we’re also beginning to adjust. We’re accepting how things are for now and living in the moment. In other words, we’re learning to be present and find happiness right where we are, even in a pandemic.
For me, the transition was much easier because I’m an introvert who has been needing a break for quite a while. I still feel overwhelmed some days and this pandemic has brought complications into my life, especially for work and my business. But I have also found peace. I’m missing my yoga and Zumba classes and Matthew misses his sense of security and spontaneity. We’re both missing time with friends. While we figure out how to stay in touch with our loved ones, we’re also finding joy together at home. Although we did bicker a little at first, we both realized that it wasn’t the other person that we were angry with, but rather the situation we have found ourselves in.
We started making more time for fun together and instead searched for the little joys instead of the little annoyances. With empathy and compassion for our partners and ourselves, we can come out on top. If you’re struggling financially because of the crisis, working together as a team and being kind to one another through the stress is imperative to stay strong together. I wanted to share some fun ideas for couples quarantined together during Covid-19 to help keep the pressure off and find happiness together, even during the most stressful or uncertain of times. But remember, the most important thing to do is to be kind and loving to yourself and your partner. You’re both in this together.
Here are several methods and activities for making the most of your quarantine at home together:
One. Spend time pursing your passions separately so you’ll have time apart to recharge and something exciting to talk about and share. For me, that is working on my blog or reading and for Matthew that is time spent with friends playing video games virtually or taking his online classes. Although we live in a studio apartment, we find ways to be alone. I tend to hang out upstairs in our lofted bedroom while Matthew stays downstairs.
Two. Turn your home into a restaurant. Decorate a space or even set up a table somewhere else in your home besides your usual meal nook. Hang up decorations or lights, put out candles, and take our your best dishes and glasses for a romantic meal.
Three. Rent a movie neither of you have ever seen and make some popcorn.
Four. Self-care. For you to be happy you must be healthy. Together or apart go for walks, get in daily exercise, meditate, eat healthy, take baths, and do activities that nourish your bodies and souls. When your needs are being taken care of and you’re feeling healthy and relaxed, you’ll be less likely to argue over the little things. You can also have an at-home spa day together; take a bath, face masks, or even give one another relaxing massages.
Five. Game night. Order a new game or puzzle from online or pull out an oldie and get your game on. Matthew and I have been really into Ticket To Ride. Through various online apps and Zoom you can also expand your game night to a night with friends.
Six. Do activities together at home such as baking or reading together. You’ll be amazed at how much joy that can be found in sharing the simple things.
Seven. Date night dance. After a formal dinner at home, turn your living room into a dance hall. Lower the lights, put up twinkle lights or candles, hang decorations if you want to, dress up in your best clothes, and listen to you favorite songs as you dance the night away. Very romantic.
Eight. Do something funny or creative. Nothing is more attractive to your partner than seeing you having fun and being your true self. Do a funny or creative activity together such as building a blanket fort, having a pillow fight, make a dance challenge, create a treasure hunt, write a short story or poem for each other, or even taking turns drawing one another.
Nine. Get outside together if you can. Go for a walk in your neighborhood, play a game in your yard if you have one, have a meal out on your balcony, or find a place to hike while being able to adhere to social distancing. You need fresh air, exercise, and nature to be happy. Find that time together.
Ten. Write a love letter to your partner. When was the last time, if ever, that you have given your loved one a hand written note? If one of you is working and the other is not, if you’re both essential workers, or if you’re both stuck together at home, writing a letter to tell your lover what you adore and appreciate about them and who they are is always a wonderful idea.
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