Why Minimalism Doesn’t Have The Answers, But It Does Hold A Key

Minimalism did not save my life. I enjoy decluttering my space and removing items that do not “spark joy” as much as the next person, but it didn’t change my life, even if it did alter my perspective. Three years ago we donated about 40% of our belongings and moved into a tiny studio apartment. I needed a restart after quitting a toxic job and starting a new one that would be more positive in my life and also allow me more time to work on my photography business and delve into the world of blogging. Life was good, but there was still much to be done.

It turns out that moving to a smaller space, decluttering your home, and living with less does not heal your traumatic past, fix your toxic relationships, or make you feel all that much better. It is true that our environments do have an impact on how we feel, but our environments are much more than stuff or the lack thereof. While minimalism did give me some great tools, it was not the answer.

I spent much of our early adulthood apartment living trying to acquire the “necessities.” You know, a table, chair, a sofa, dishes, towels, linens, and clothes. Minimalism helped me know when I had reached enough or even too much. Minimalism gave me the tools to declutter what I no longer use or need. It helped me to also declutter my digital life and how I spend my time. It gave me more money in the bank and better thoughts on spending and saving. I am thankful to the lessons if living with minimalism, but it is not the answer.

The true answer comes form living an authentic and healthy life complete with good mental health and a thriving lifestyle. Yes, minimalism can be a part of that, but it is not the fixer of all. For one, you can’t use it to hide form your problems or to focus your energy on decluttering and simple living. You need to focus that energy on wholehearted living. Minimalism may remove the distractions, but it is up to you to do the mental work.

My husband is not a minimalist. He hates living in tiny spaces and at 6’2″ I don’t blame him. He likes having rooms for different things instead of consolidating our functional living space. He has less clothes and things than I do. But he also holds onto more junk that I do and leaves things out for “convenience.” Me, the “minimalist” owns a whole lot more clothes and books than he does. But I also like tidiness, order, and smaller spaces. We’re yin and yang.

While minimalism was lovely and we will carry many of the tools with us, I think we’re leaving full minimalism behind us when we move in a couple weeks and replacing it with simple living instead. Sometimes living more simply actually does mean more space. More outdoor space and a yard. More living space for organization and functionality. No matter where you live I thoroughly believe that your space, no matter the size, must be functional and usable for you. It doesn’t do to have extra rooms that are never used or fill up with junk. And likewise, it doesn’t do to cram everything you need into a tiny space and not be able to live how you want to. For example, our current living room is not just our entertainment area, it is our home office, home library, work out room, dining room when we fold out the table, and everything else. It is small and cluttered and we can’t get work done or host dinners or even get in a full home work out in that space. It just isn’t feasible.

The new apartment has a separate room for a home library and office. There is room in the kitchen for a table and some chairs, and the living room will be just a living room and home workout spot. It is not just the space itself that is going to change. The window light will much improve and our moods will as a result, especially because Matthew suffers greatly from Seasonal Affect Disorder. We will be within walking distance of beautiful parks, a great downtown, and we’ll even have our own front porch and yard space. More exercise and outdoor time will be the result. Do you see where I’m heading? It’s a whole lifestyle change that is what the true goal is, not simply owning less stuff.

When we made the big move three years ago I was very much into the decluttering phase. And while I stand by most of the items I let go of and still declutter regularly, I do have some regrets. I thought I could only own a certain number of clothing items, so I let go of a few items that I now miss and regret donating. I still feel good about most, but sometimes I did declutter for the sake of doing minimalism “right” or trying to reach an imaginary goal or because I started feeling guilty for owning stuff. And that is not the point of minimalism either. If you use it and love it of course you should keep it. If it makes you feel bad or you have no intention of using it then letting things go is good.

True well being starts the moment we start our day. Making healthy mental choices, limiting digital noise, removing toxic relationships to make more way for the good ones, getting exercise and time outdoors, doing work that makes us feel proud and good about ourselves, having the time for the people and the activities that we love, and living a life that is authentic and true to ourselves.

Simple living, for me, is a form of minimalism in a way, but it delves deeper. It is not just removing physical things, but also toxic people, environments, and a frantic and rushing lifestyle. It is about living with more intention and being mindful. It is about gratitude, taking care of ourselves, and being in the moment. It is my “live lovely” motto in action.

So minimalism doesn’t have the answers, but it does hold the keys. You do not need to be a minimalist or even a perfect minimalist to benefit from some of these lessons in owning and spending less to make more time for the good in our lives.