Three Steps To Build Resilience | Tuesday Tea

Some of us have been knocked down one too many times and need to relearn resilience. Life happens and with it comes many ups and downs, although sometimes the downs may appear much more enduring than they should. If you have found yourself re-living the past one too many times or ruminating over past hurts, recent or long behind us, there is a way to recover your resilience and to move forward again. The first step is to be compassionate towards yourself. You have been through some rough experiences and it is completely natural to feel sad, hurt, angry, betrayed, or even like you will never be yourself again. I promise, you will be. It takes some time and some work.

Grab yourself a cup of tea (or coffee or hot chocolate) for comfort and coziness and sit down with yourself for five to ten minutes. Ask yourself, what is it that is harming you or keeping you trapped in time or place? Then think about resilience. What does it mean? How can strengthening your own resilience help you now and in the future?

One. Remove yourself from toxicity. -It could be a toxic environment, a toxic person, or even a toxic habit such as living in your toxic past or battling a bad habit. Some of the things that harm us the most cannot be removed from our existence, such as the loss of a loved one or grieving a break up. But we can remove the toxicity within ourselves starting with the way we think and the toxic thoughts we have about ourselves and our present and future. Thoughts such as, “I will never be happy again,” are the culprit ruining our resilience. To remove this poison from our lives is the first step towards healing and rebuilding resilience.

Two. Practice acceptance for the things you cannot change and let it go. We cannot change the past, so what can we do? We can learn acceptance. Even if what has happened is completely unforgettable or unforgivable, we can practice understanding that it did happen and cannot be changed. The constant ruminating and what-ifs only compounds our pain. Practice acceptance so we can give more thought to what is in our lives right now. The past is the past, and yes, it does impact who we are and how we feel in the present and the future, but it does not have to control our lives.

Three. Rebuild self-esteem. Chances are, whatever experience that brought you to this point has in some way impacted your self-esteem and the way you view and feel about yourself and your life. The only way to rebuild self-esteem is through removing toxic thoughts and getting out and doing again. By trying new things or practicing old things, we can experience moments of growth. We must face what roadblocks we have and continue to confront them to build up the strength to move past them and to build up our abilities. Try new things and watch yourself grow. Practice old things and watch yourself improve. There will be setbacks, mistakes, and even failures, but by trying again and again you will build yourself up. Resilience cannot endure without being challenged. Take care of yourself from your mind to your body. When we are healthy and well-groomed we are much happier.

Wishing you a day of peace and resilience.